On October 11, 2013 I spoke at a Safe-T Conference where the participants were college students, social workers and counselors who are attending for Continuing Education credit. I was asked to address the Spiritual Aspect of healing of the victim of Abuse. 14 Years Later I was invited to speak to the SFACC (South Florida Association of Christian Counselors) about the Impact of Forgiveness on Trauma. After teaching the workshop (3 hours) several counselors said to me, “We may have the degrees but you have the wisdom.”
“Your statutes are my delight; they are my counselors.” Psalm 119:24
The Association’s director Dr. Virkler (Leads the SFACC/author/professor PBAU) sent me this letter just before I taught the workshop.
“In preparing for your workshop, I’ve been re-reading your book “Free Yourself to Love.” Although as a Christian counselor I’ve been studying the process of forgiveness for many years, I’m really appreciating for the second time the wonderful insights you share in that book. In recent years a lot of attention has been given to Bowlby’s theory about attachment and the very popular theory that grew out of Bowlby (emotionally-focused couple therapy–which emphasizes the importance of secure attachments), I think you rightly emphasize that holding on to resentment interferes with our ability to develop secure attachments in such an insightful way. Just wanted to say that as a way of saying I think God has given you a very biblical message that also resonates with important contemporary psychological and relational theories, and I’m looking forward to your workshop very much. I hope you’ll have some of your “Free Yourself to Love” books for sale at the workshop, just because I think that could be such a good biblio-therapy resource for our counselors”.
Your faithful support has allowed me to not only spend years writing material to encourage God’s kids but also daily making a difference as a part of the Kendall Tag Team (Isa. 50:4).
If I purchased a hundred Father’s Day cards,
Today I placed my left hand on my Bible and with a pen I traced my hand over the Psalm that I had just read. There are certain verses I have memorized and there are some that are so familiar that I smile when I turn the page in my One Year Bible and see the Psalm that is waiting to encourage my soul. This is what I read, and although it is so familiar, something so fresh and new flowed across my soul.
friend actually means ‘part of the family’. We as Christians are part of a massive family with so many needs. God forbid we are too busy to be available when a friend, family member is facing a crisis. The verse states that a friend loves at all times; whether one’s friend is in a crisis or finally exiting the crisis.
At my 50th Birthday party, Ken read the most moving tribute to me in front of a room packed with my dearest friends. At the end of the tribute, Ken invited me to dance with him to the song, “Unforgettable.” No words adequate to express the impact of that moment except to shout at the end of our dance… “Ken, you have written the perfect Eulogy for my Relocation to Heaven celebration someday!” Sixteen years later, one of the greatest Pauline scholars in the world, hand-wrote a tribute to me in front of his newest book, “Paul Behaving Badly by Dr, E. Randolph Richards. I once again shouted…this needs to be read at my “Relocation to Heaven Celebration before Ken reads his tribute to me.” Now don’t think I am morbid, I just know that I am on a limited day pass and I know that my Relocation Celebration may come sooner than one would think and I want these two tributes read for God’s glory.
encouraging couples who want to have a marriage that lasts longer than a breath-mint!
wisdom. When it was put ‘back in context’ I realized that in trials and suffering God will generously supply the wisdom to maneuver in these storms as well as be my comforter (II Cor. 1:3). God gives such insight and clarity when we seek Him in our trials rather than scramble for the available comfort and anesthetizing items of life (food, techno entertainment, hobbies, mall therapy, etc.). In your trials this year, did you find yourself seeking God’s wisdom to behave yourself in the testing of your faith? Just wondering…
daily time in God’s Word. Throughout the conference, we would speak several more times and I shared about different study methods and commentaries that I have used to become a student of the Word. When I left that conference, I went home and placed this couples name on my prayer Rolodex that I pray through on days of fasting. So for more than a decade I have prayed for this young couple who I never saw again. Then I hear what God is doing in his life not only in this church in Charlotte but all over the world. I jumped up and went to get the index card from my Rolodex with the pastor’s name on it. We were all wowed by the reality of holy sweat in prayer!
needed to go to Celebrate Recovery. And she was serious! I thought she was crazy. Surely she grossly misunderstood my situation. After all, I’m not an addict. I couldn’t possibly need recovery. I ignored her suggestion and continued the insanity cycle-doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results. I had been doing it for a long time: masking pain, coping with the shame of my past in unhealthy ways and trying to survive a sexually dysfunctional marriage. It wasn’t working. On the outside, people saw the polished Christina-supermom to four little kids, entrepreneur, godly wife and leader. But they didn’t see what was silently killing me. My marriage felt helpless and hopeless, and the shame of my past decisions was crippling me spiritually and emotionally. I couldn’t forgive myself or get over some of the baggage I was carrying. Desperate and not knowing where to turn, I soon realized I could no longer carry it on my own. But where could I turn? Who do I share these embarrassing issues with? Church? If we’re honest, most churches seem more like a place to parade our spiritual resumes than to declare our weaknesses. Most churches maybe. But not all churches. Within five minutes of my first visit to Celebrate Recovery at The Rock, ministry leader Ray Hutchison’s voice boomed through the microphone, “This is a safe place. You can take your masks off here. We’re all messed up, every single one of us.” I sat there, a bit stunned; church had never felt like a safe place.